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6 Ways to Avoid Mother’s Day When It Hurts


12 May

Mother’s Day isn’t for everyone, in fact the exclusion is right in the name.  A lot of people find Mother’s Day painful, or even offensive. After all, traditionally it doesn’t include people that have acted like moms to children whose real mothers weren’t around for various reason. It doesn’t really embrace nontraditional mother figures of any kind. For those whose mothers or mother figures have passed, Mother’s Day serves only as a painful reminder of what they’ve lost.  Finally, for those who can’t have their own children it is a bitter reminder of what they’ll never have.

Sometimes Mother's Day leaves a shadow on your heart

So how do you avoid a holiday that is being advertised everywhere? TV commercials, the internet, even the beloved candy aisle isn’t safe.  When everywhere you turn there’s a reminder of Mother’s Day it can feel like the world doesn’t care about your feelings. But that isn’t true: you’re not alone, and we get how much this holiday can hurt.

If you want to avoid reminders here are some easy tips for making May a bit more comfortable.

1. When you see Mother’s Day e-mails pop up in your inbox, count to 10 and breathe. When you sign up for a company’s newsletter, they very often don’t ask you exactly what content you’d like to get. However, they ARE willing to learn. Just send back an email letting them know that you would like to be excluded from their Mother’s Day e-mails and more often than not they’ll be happy to make that change for you. If they won’t, or can’t, you can often create your own e-mail filters using keywords to send them right to your spam or trash folder.

2. Remind yourself that every holiday has its perks. A lot of businesses will have sales before and after the holiday. Take this time to shop for yourself. Clothes, home goods, and candy are popular items to discount to encourage high sales.

3. More people than you realize have problems with this holiday, reach out. There are online forums where people can get together to work through their feelings. Try talking to your friends if you haven’t already to see if any of them feel the same. Soon you may find yourself with a group of people that would rather spend the weekend on an adventure together than worrying about the never-ending stream of Mother’s Day adverts.

Mend a motherless heart on Mother's Day

4. It’s okay to be mad. It’s okay to be sad. If you’re feeling it, it’s okay, and it will pass. The worst thing you can do with your emotions is refuse to give yourself permission to feel them. The second worst thing you can do is be consumed by them. Take time to journal or vent about what you’re going through some way. Make a play list that really sums up what you’re thinking. Paint, take a pottery class. Maybe sit with a scrapbook to remember better times. But at the end of the night try to steer yourself to something a bit more positive. Maybe something that honors your mother’s memory. Or something that is designed to be completely self-indulgent.

5. Try to remember that it’s okay not to like something. It is not, however, okay to ruin it for someone else. People are going to want to talk about their Mother’s Day plans with their friends. If you can’t take that, let your friends know in advance or when the topic comes up. Real friends will be happy to respect your limits, and they may surprise you with helpful information. If you’re really lucky, they’ll surprise you with wine, chocolate, or something extra indulgent for yourself.

6. If the only thing you don’t like about Mother’s Day is the traditional definition, then change it! Maybe you have two moms. Maybe you have a whole host of people that have been like a mother to you. That is wonderful news! And those people deserve to be celebrated, too. There’s absolutely no reason that you can’t celebrate them on Mother’s Day. In fact, you should, and you should talk about it.

Now, You Know How To Avoid Mother’s Day – What’s Next? 

  • Pamper yourself or those you love with something delicious. Browse spring gifts to USA, Australia & 200 countries, and make sure your surprise is delivered on time!
  • If you are not trying to avoid the holiday read 10 Mother’s Day Tips to Piss Off Your Mom.
  • You’ve read this far, we’re sure you have a friend who’d like to see this too. Click those share buttons below.
 
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